So, you have traits of ADHD (attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder). Welcome! In recent months the number of people reporting traits of ADHD in my practice has increased considerably.

While a clinical counsellor cannot diagnose ADHD (you’d want to see a family doctor, psychiatrist or psychologist for that) what they can do is support you in your journey and improve some of the direct symptoms but also some of the secondary symptoms (such as loneliness or low self-esteem) that have been created due to having had traits of ADHD.

ADHD will affect one person very differently from another. Whether you have all of the traits of ADHD or just a few here are 3 examples of ways in which seeing a counsellor can help.

(1) GETTING THINGS DONE

Some of my clients with traits of ADHD report difficultly accurately assessing how long a task will take. They may also procrastinate, get easily distracted, or hyperfocus.

Ask for coaching from your counsellor. Identify what your priorities are: where do you want to put your energy? What is your first step to getting there? When would you like to do that first step by? How will you be accountable to getting it done by then?

Learn how to not be so all or nothing. It’s ok and normal to empty part of the dishwasher and finish later. Learn what works for you and how to lean into your strengths to maximize efficiency.

Get your life working well in the areas of school, work, finances, relationships, and parenting. Learn how to get things done in a way that works for you.

(2) FEELINGS OF LONELINESS

Some of my clients with traits of ADHD may report that it is harder to connect well to others. They may report being highly sensitive to rejection. They often feel excluded. They experience frequent episodes of feeling like others are mad at them. They may feel a sense of being “an alien,” or different from others.

A counsellor can help you read people. Learn social skills so you can feel more at ease with others. Develop less exhausting and more satisfying relationships. Learn how to identify and communicate your limitations to people you care about so that they understand you.

(3) FEELINGS OF SHAME or LOW SELF-ESTEEM

Many clients with traits of ADHD report feelings of shame. They may have had experiences like difficulty in school or job losses. They may have gotten in trouble with friends or family who don’t understand their limitations.

I know you are being blamed for “purposely” letting others down or not being able to get work handed in or not being able to sit nicely. Let’s reframe these incidents as you trying your best but coming up against real limitations. Get unshamed. Remember that there are pros and cons to having traits of ADHD. It’s not all good or all bad and you are doing your best.

People with ADHD traits are often incredibly creative, fun, intelligent, caring and empathic individuals. Learn how to harness this super power by (1) Getting things done, (2) Creating satisfying relationships and (3) Increasing feelings of self-esteem. These are just 3 ways that working with an experienced counsellor can help you with your traits of ADHD.

Feel free to reach me at NatalieHansenCounselling@gmail.com

Warmly,

Natalie

Natalie Hansen, MA, RCC
Registered Clinical Counsellor
Individual and Couples Therapist
(604) 816-6532